it didn't even hurt

This morning I had my very first mammogram done at the hospital where I work. I was fearing all these horror stories of how my poor boobs were going to feel and shockingly enough, nothing hurt. At. All. I had zero pain and I was wondering what the fuss was all about !!?! Kind of like when I had my colonoscopy done on March 14th... the prep work was literally a piece of cake. I actually LOVED the mixture I had to drink with my orange Gatorade. And my boob thing was over in 15 minutes. I had more anxiety while trying unsuccessfully to fall asleep.

And now I sit. In the dark. With the fan on. And I'm wiped out. I spent from Friday night to yesterday evening at my mom's house.... catching up on lost sleep and doing 43 book markers for the little second graders in Yankton who will be going through first holy communion.

I thought about going to Yankton today but I have no gumption to do anything other than empty my bladder, watch "16 & Pregnant" and plan a long cozy nap.

wednesday blahs

Well here I am. Alive. Not sick. Semi-tired but I am here. I'm very late in creating 43 book markers for a commissioned project I said I'd do back in early February. I have two weeks to complete this task and I have no motivation to do it.

On Monday, I spent the afternoon with my mom on her 71st birthday. We went to Vermillion to check out some thrift stores and found that of the THREE there, only two were open. And we really wanted to go to the one that was closed on Mondays. But it was cold and wet and it rained all day long. Then it snowed. Again.

Yesterday, I did absolutely nothing but paid $9 to mail back a box of clothes from Lane Bryant... marked ALL TOO BIG! Yay for me but I wasn't feeling like paying nine bucks on postage either. I did get a nap in and that felt awesome to do. I managed to lounge about on facebook for most of the day and eat crap. Oh and the snow melted much later in the afternoon.

Here I am on Hump Day. I'm already dressed for work (at 2pm) and I'm cold. I will be paying my $86.06 heating bill today (ugh) an outrageous thing to do really. I was pampered for four years at Sutton. My heat was paid in full there. Before that when I owned my townhouse, my heating bill was over $150 every month yet it had 3 floors to heat. So paying $86.06 today for my teeny tiny apartment on one level (the basement level) is just plain idiotic.

Tomorrow I am planning a farewell potluck to the two nursing students we have from USD. We've had them every Thursday since the beginning of January. And both are super sweet and kind and nice and friendly and hard working soon-to-be nurses.

Here's a list of some of things that are bothering me today:

1. South Dakota cold temps in mid April.
2. Snow.
3. Cold rain.
4. Having to bundle up like an Eskimo to stay warm while sleeping.
5. My sinuses.
6. Gum that loses its flavor.
7. America's Top Model.
8. And Tyra Banks.
9. Poop.
10. And the smell of it.
11. Working with negative people.
12. Or people who complain, in general.
13. Burnt popcorn.
14. Bad teeth.
15. Constipation.
16. The color tan.
17. Cracked windshields.
18. Hand lotion that leaves your hands sticky.
19. Parrots.
20. Director chairs.
21. Boxing.
22. Too small bathtubs.
23. Valances.
24. Cheap talk.
25. Taking out the trash.
26. Nuns.
27. Mustaches.
28. Facial hair in general.
29. Curtains that don't keep the sun/light out.
30. Rough toilet paper.
31. Unsolved true crime cases.
32. Why the two 14-year-olds in Minnesota committed suicide on April 16th.

Here is #32's disturbing link:
http://abcnews.go.com/US/suicide-pact-minnesota-eighth-graders-haylee-fentress-paige/story?id=13411751

i am alive. still.

I cannot believe I have gone 9 days without blogging. To be honest, I have been dead tired. I had a grueling 4 and a half days of hard work, at duh, work. Then yesterday was my mom's 71st birthday and I was tooooo tired to really enjoy spending the day with her. I'll regret this later, I'm sure. And it rained ALL DAY long... then while I was sleeping, it snowed. Again.

Will write more later.

misfits unite

Sorry about being MIA .... I've been painting up a storm for commissioned orders and myself. And I've been doing a lot of thinking too about my choices I've made in 2011 so far.

I've been wondering if I made the right choice to move to the hamlet that I am now living in. I thought I'd be saving a lot of money but I'm not. I'm right back to where I was where I moved from.

Poor as a church mouse.

And it sucks. Ass.

However, isn't she, my flaming orange haired misfit, adorable?

She's 16"x20 and is posted right above my bed. Last night I did a smaller version of it --- I made sure I drew arms and gloves --- and she'll go on my locker at work. This brown haired misfit is supposed to be me (hopefully by summer, my hair will be this long and curly)....and this painting is a little larger than 5"x7."

So in the village I moved from, there was a murder there, yesterday. A 28 year old guy shot his 25 year old live in girlfriend at 3AM CST while she was in her car, leaving. He then shot himself in the head. And SURVIVED!!! He's in now in critical condition. What an ass eh? See, the place where I was living, is not known for any major crime except drugs and drunk driving. Crime like this is so pointless. Of course, yes, crime overall, is stupid.

By the way, did anyone catch last night's 48 Hours Mystery, about the Air Cadet Colonnel in Canada?

um, what did you say?

Yesterday I received a very very very RARE text from my sister on the West Coast that came with an image of a roaring fire in a fire pit in their newly constructed outdoor deck made out of rocks/stones that her husband designed a couple of years ago.

The text said:

"Wishing you were here."

I double checked to see if she really sent the text to me and wasn't a forward like she always does or has done in the past. Nope. I looked to see if it was sent to all my siblings but realized I couldn't see that nugget. And I just sat stunned in my car. Like really really really stunned.

She lives in Washington. I'm 10 miles from our childhood home and I haven't seen her in 2 years and we haven't spoken on the phone in same amount of time. We MAY have sent a couple of emails here and there but nothing personal like "hey sis, how are you? i love you" kind of emails. Nothing like that. At. All.

We are each others "friends" on facebook but I say that loosely. I've been on facebook since 2007 and she just joined not even a year ago. She told me it was a waste of time. She said the same thing about pedicures and manicures to me when I suggested she get them to relax... but now she's a regular. She's four years older than me and yet I'm the fun one. She's the married one. And I accepted the fact many many years ago that we are not friends and we will never be. I've tried to no avail. Her loss really. But I adore her husband and her three children. Still like others have told me, her loss.

On facebook, she likes to tell my sister-in-law of 25 years how much she loves her on her Wall... but never says anything at all to me on my Wall. She sends her love loudly on other fb pages of mutual friends, other relatives, etc... but not me. I get no love from her on facebook. I question it almost daily as to why I'm even on her friends list.

So you can imagine the shock, horror (?) and surprise I was feeling yesterday.... when I got the roaring fire pit, with her spouse and my niece and nephew on the image with that message.

Seriously people, she's never wanted me to be included in anything of her personal life. Ever. Honest to God.

So I waited about six hours before I sent a text back. And then she responded immediately after that comment too. I'm really really confused. So much that when I had lunch with my mom at her house today, I couldn't bring myself to mention it to her. And I always talk about my sister with my mom. Always.

Weird.

i spy a fly....

facebook is just stupid. and people are stupid. in general I mean on facebook. I was just about to sign out for the night, some three hours ago when I came upon a photo of an old coworker at the call center hell --- the place you know where I was trapped for six years.... well I worked with some really doozies .....so I click on the photo and up came one of the biggest skanks known to mankind or in this case, known to the village I just moved from .... and one click lead to another click and there I was on her entire WIDE OPEN FACEBOOK PAGE. She has nothing any private settings. Nothing. So I scanned through all 12 albums.... staring/gawking/whatever you wanna call it at all her hoochie-mama photos and all of her awful "mini-me" hoochie daughter's photos... boobs hanging out, making seductive poses with their lips being pouty or pursed together. Big skank, little skank.

The funny thing is... about two weeks ago, my mom and I were in Wally World and came upon these two... they had a cart filled to the brim with new toys (for her and her 16 yr old daughter) ....I said to my mom that I bet she had just gotten her $5,000 income tax return... 'cuz she did that every year... spent the entire 5 grand on shit for herself and her two bastard children.

And there, before my spying eyes .... was all her skanky photos of her skanky self. It's good to see that she's stayed the same after all these years since I last laid eyes on her as a fellow coworker. And come on, seriously people.... block people like me from gawking all over your facebook pages! Jesus Almighty! ....AND block them from others like say your employers from looking through nearly ALL of them with you and the booze you are heavily consuming....

Stupid is as stupid does I guess.

remember steve?

my very good lookin' neighbor who lived kitty corner from me??? the one who said he was really really good lookin' about 14 times in a 5 minute conversation to me when I first moved in??? Yeah THAT Steve.

He moved. To Iowa.

Yesterday.

two years ago today...

April 1, 2009 at 3:30PM I was aptly fired from call center hell. I had worked six years, three months and 29 days for that hillbilly shit hole. And I was kicked to the curb. Along with several hundred other folks. It was the greatest firing of all my firings in my entire career of getting a paycheck. I first started paying taxes back in the seventh grade washing dishes at a steak house then moved up to waitressing in high school and early college-hood. But enough about my big life journey of jobs..... And look at me now... living 35 miles away from that big metropolis of a village and enjoying somewhat my new digs, new job, new set of cohorts, new problems, new homestead, new everything.... Don't ya just love the little creepy miss ....And happy April Fool's to you too. Goodnight.